5 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Propose On TwitterJuly 7, 2018
Yes, it’s come to this: guys are proposing on Twitter. Do social network proposals marks the death of chivalry. If the only proposal a guy can muster is, “@suzy Will U marry me?,” chivalry isn’t dead–it’s been murdered, thrown into the woodchipper, and chopped into a million pieces.
While supremely lame, I kind of understand proposing on Facebook. You already share your entire life with the world in the form of photos and status updates, so why not ask the person you love if she wants to grow old together on the same place your friends post their FarmVille updates? But Twitter proposals are just wrong. Here are five reasons why your guy (or you) should never propose on Twitter.
Someday, you’ll have to explain Twitter to your grandkids
And it’ll go a little something like this:
“Gather round, kids, and let ol’ Grandpappy tell you the tale of how I proposed to your Grandma. See, back in the early ’10s, there was this thing called The Twitter. People would sent out ‘tweets’ into cyberspace about, oh, say what they had for lunch that day for all the world to see. What’s that, junior? Why did people do such a thing? Uh, you know, come to think of it, I don’t rightly know. Anyway, that doesn’t matter now. The point is, I posted a Tweet asking your dear ol’ grandma if she would have my hand in– Junior! Turn off that jetpack and get back here! Don’t make me put you over my robotic knee!”
She might not check her @ replies that day
Think about it: You’ve come home from a hard day at work to find your boyfriend with a big dopey grin on his face. You wonder if maybe he finally finished StarCraft II, or discovered a new Thai place that delivers. “So what’s your answer?,” he asks. “What are you talking about?,” you reply. Suddenly he realizes– you didn’t check your @ replies on Twitter today. His big plan has been blown, and now he has to sit you down at your computer and make you check Twitter. Talk about anticlimatic.
Instead of saying congrats, people will just retweet you
Pretty soon, we won’t even have to attend weddings. We’ll just follow them live on Twitter while watching So You Think You Can Dance from the comfort of home.
There are so many better ways to propose in public
Every day, some romantic nerd pops the question in a creatively geeky way. The Internet is rife with clever and sweet proposals executed via hacked video games, comics, iPhone apps, and more. While these sort of proposals aren’t for everyone, they are definitely charming and thoughtful. At the very least, they take effort, and usually have a special meaning for the couple.
Important life moments shouldn’t happen on the same place where Kanye West discusses the pros and cons of fur pillows. Seriously, Kanye’s Tweets are hilarious.
What would you do if your guy proposed to you over Twitter? Reply back, retweet, or dump?
Photo by Jakob Owens on Unsplash